This World Just Might Make It; or, Seriously Kids, No Martinis When You’re Behind The Wheel

While cruising the news today, I found a story out of Colorado that reaffirmed my faith in humanity.  It was a story about three youths dying in a drunk driving accident.  I know what you’re thinking: “Dan, you are one sick fuck.  What is affirming about three kids snatched away before their time?  Asshole.”  You [...]

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Pervert, Preacher, Politician, and Predator All Start With P, That Can’t Be a Coincidence

               So, I was reading some news today, and I came across a story about the mayor of a tiny town in Missouri called Collins being arrested for soliciting sex over the internet from a cop pretending to be a 13-year-old girl.  Allen Kauffman, 63, is the mayor of [...]

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Get To Know Dan Through Music Videos Chapter 2; or, I’m a ScatDan

Lucky you, your next peek into my psyche came sooner than later.  The second video that speaks volumes about who I am as a person and what made me that way comes from Scatman John.  I tend not to like dance music too much (I don’t like to be sonically reminded that I look like [...]

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Get To Know Dan Through Music Videos Chapter 1; or, “All’s I Need Is Pornography, and My Friends and Family To Give Me Money”

I recently realized that there are a lot of you Friesen Pointers out there who don’t know me personally.  I have been functioning off the assumption for the last year that I’m writing for an audience entirely made up of my friends (because who else would read this drivel?), so I’ve neglected to write posts [...]

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Every “Independent” Movie That Makes It To Number 2 In The Box Office Is Overrated; or, I Can’t Write Movie Reviews, I Just Really Wanted An Excuse To Write About Horny Lesbian Werewolves

For the last two years, I have resisted the draw of the darling “independent” movie of each year, flatly refusing to watch even a minute of Napoleon Dynamite and Little Miss Sunshine.  Both movies had a chance, I could have seen them and possibly would have, until every last motherfucking person I knew was telling [...]

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I Would Kill Myself In Prison If I Were Caught By That Team of Yahoos; or, The Year of The Dog

 So, the American Dialect Society has named “subprime” the word of the year for 2007.  This is bally-hoo.  Granted, I am not in the money business; I have no loans out, no mortgages, and I’m not entirely clear what subprime even means.  All I really know is that President Bush has been throwing the word [...]

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Good Role Models Are Overrated; or, I’ll Never Say “It’s Dark And Hell Is Hot” Is a Bad Album; or, What The Hell Happened To Drag-On?

  Looking back on my life up until this point, one thing becomes abundantly clear: I have been blessed by having lots of quality anti-role models.  People always talk about how it’s important when you’re growing up to have good role models to show you how to live, but no one ever makes the opposite argument.  [...]

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In Which Dan Friesen Listens To His Sunset Dreaming; or, My Parents Also Had a Peter, Paul, & Mary Album

A lot of people ask me why I resent my parents so much.  The answer is not instantly apparent.  They are good people, instilled decent ethics into me, supported me through some hard times, and forgave things I did that lesser parents wouldn’t have.
They are paying for me to go to school, even though I [...]

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